I was planning to post next about reorganizing my pantry, but things can change quickly. Last year I found a lump in my right breast. I have a history of cysts, as do women in my family. I saw my doctor, had a physical exam (I’d had a recent clear mammogram) and went on my way under the assumption is was another cyst. I went back recently for a routine appointment and this time had a mammogram and ultrasound to check it out. Since it didn’t look great, they followed up with a biopsy.
My doctor called with the news that the biopsy came back cancerous 2 1/2 weeks ago. I can’t believe it’s only been 2 1/2 weeks. So much has happened since then. All the emotions, endless phone calls, lots of appointments. And So. Much. Waiting.
When we first got the call, we knew very little. That is the WORST, and I’m learning part of the deal with a cancer journey. All of my worst fears played out in my head, but I clung to my faith, my family and some incredible friends while we waited. After a couple of friends read my charts and helped us navigate next steps, I went back in for an MRI before meeting with the first surgeon. A little over a week of waiting for clarification. It was filled with every emotion, lots of prayers, and too much time on the internet. (They aren’t joking when they say to stay off of Google!)
Then we met with the first surgeon and heard the best news we could hope to hear! Praise God! For all of my prayer warriors out there, I’m beyond grateful for your prayers! My diagnosis is stage 1A, a relatively small mass, the most common type of breast cancer and my lymph nodes look clear on all the imaging. (The details are invasive ductal carcinoma (IDC), grade 2, that is PR+/ER+/HER2-.) Which is extremely treatable!
It’s super overwhelming trying to find the right healthcare team. The next several days were filled with phone calls, paperwork, scheduling and then appointments. So far we’ve seen a local surgeon and oncologist, a team at KU Medical Center in Kansas City and next week we see a surgeon at Washington University in St. Louis.
Some of the best advice I’ve gotten from friends and one of the docs is not to rush right now. It’s so tempting to jump in to surgery quickly just to get it out of me. But each decision has repercussions and once the ball is rolling, some things can’t be undone. So we are taking our time to get opinions, understand options and find the right healthcare relationships so that we can have more peace with how we move forward.
Next Steps
So here we are. I have SO much else to share already and it hasn’t even been 3 full weeks yet. (Again, that feels so crazy.) Next week, we should be able to select a surgeon so we can move forward. It will still be about a month before we have all the information and know how this journey will unfold. Right now, I have a choice between a lumpectomy with radiation or mastectomy. There are pros and cons to each, and it’s a very personal decision. Most women seem to instinctively lean one way or another. I want to keep as much of my own body as possible, so that’s my choice as long as it remains a good option.
Radiation has been a tough pill for me to swallow. I prefer plants and natural therapies whenever possible. I believe in my body’s ability to heal when given the right tools. I struggle with the idea of doing something harmful to my body in the name of healing. And side effects are scary. From the day of the diagnosis, I’ve been on my knees. Waiting with confident hope for God’s nudge guiding me on the path He has for me.
There are still a few things that could change the course of treatment. (1) We are waiting on results of genetic testing that will show if I have an inherited gene mutation that (BRCA) that increases cancer risk. Most women don’t and I don’t have history of breast cancer on either side in my family, and we are praying that I don’t. (2) My lymph nodes look clear on all my imaging so far (mammogram, ultrasound and MRI), but they won’t know for sure until surgery. And (3), once they remove the tumor, they will send it off for tests to determine if there’s anything weird or aggressive about it.
UPDATE: Good news today! We got the genetic test results and everything is clear! No BRCA gene mutations, which is a step closer to avoiding a chemo recommendation by the docs!
In the meantime, I’m looking into what I can do to support my body, speed healing, nourish my cells, and help prevent cellular damage. I’ve been to Natural Grocer’s approximately 52 times. LOL! There’s so much more to say, but I wanted to start with the news, what we know, and what we think comes next.
This will be an unexpected part of my journey. But it will not define me, I will not claim it as ME. I know that I will come out on the other side stronger, healthier, living in more freedom, and with more to offer the world. I will not let it steal my joy or cause me to live in fear. I am so crazy grateful. There has been so much unexpected beauty in this journey already. I’m thankful for every tiny detail of my life. I’m surrounded by the most incredible people and lifted up in prayer.
I’m grateful.
XO, Kelli
